My First Matches

Okay, I have stated the eHarmony thing. So far, not panning out the way that I thought it would. The first guy I made it to open communication with seemed ideal. We had emailed over open communication for a while and were doing well. He had a witty sense of humor and dedicated to helping children. He wanted a family of his own. And I know that this is not important, but he was cute too (I could tell from his pictures). The problem came when we started discussing leaving the eHarmony format. We exchanged email addresses and phone numbers. Here is the tricky part--my email address has my last name. It was then that I got an email. Still funny throughout almost ignoring the obvious, until... then the last sentence... Oh, by the way, is your ex-husband _____? HOLY SHIT!!!!! That is right he works with my ex. He didn't say that they were friends, only that he was friends with my ex's friends. Strange way to put it, I thought. So I closed that match. Relationships are complicated enough.

Next guy that I made it to the open communication level with. Sweet guy. Gentle soul. Scared of his own shadow. Now keep in mind that this is our first meeting. We kept it casual. We met for ice cream. It was time limited, I think total we sat and talked for a little over an hour. Not much in the big sceme of things. But in this time, there were some definate problems. First question he asked, Do you mind snakes? Snakes?!?!? What is running through my head is that he has a 10 foot boa constrictor in his house that will eat my dogs. No, it's a little better but not much. He has a snake phobia. So much so that he will not even go into that section of the zoo. He will not watch a movie that has snakes in it. Fear of snakes. I don't like snakes, but they don't freak me out (unless I am stuck in an innertube in the middle of the Little Pigeon River). But this seemed excessive. Second question, How big are your dogs? He really doesn't like dogs, he is especially afraid of big dogs. I just wanted to say, they may not be big, but, honey, Miriam will eat you for breakfast. Third question, Do you have a roomate? No, I say, I live alone. Aren't you scared? No, I say, I seem to get along just fine. Apparently he has always lived with a roomate and not because financial reasons, but because he doesn't want to live alone. (Side note, I am loving living by myself, life is simple, life is good, where I put something is where it stays, I have absolute say on what I watch on TV, and I can stained glass anytime that I want). Forth and final red flag question, How do you feel about traditional gender roles? I say something to the effect that it is important for the couple to work those roles out on their own, forming a compromise that works best for them. He thinks that is terrific, because in relationships he sees himself as "more of the girl." Yes, that is a direct quote. I emailed him the next day to say something along the lines that I am extremely independent and love the outdoors and adventure, that I thought that there is someone with a gentle spirit out there for him and the best thing I can do to help him find her is to close the match.

There are some strange cookies out there.