Friday, January 09, 2009

I'm Just Doing What I was Supposed To...

I went to get my allergy shot today. I am in the building phase of the shots, which means that I come in 2x a week. Not a problem, the shot room hours are great, I can go in Monday after work and Friday before work. Easy-breezy. Today, after getting my shot the nurse looks at the screen and looks at me and says, "You are really going through your shots." She said this all impressed like I was doing something amazing. Well, no, I signed up for allergy shots, commiting myself to twice a week for the first 3 months then weekly for 1-2 years after that. My understanding is that things work better when you follow the directions.

So, here is my question... Do we really live in a world where doing the bare minimum is impressive? I have noticed that all too often we set the bar low, we keep our expectations small, and then we still aren't surprised that those expectations are not met. Even at my job, I find myself growing cynical that someone is actually going to do what they said they will do. I get off the phone with someone, they have just told me that the check is going through with no issues, then I call the Accounts Payable department of that company and they have no idea about that payment--the Purchase Order hasn't even been approved. Why am I not surprised? I would have been more surprised if the payment was going through exactly as they had said.

On a side note, totally unrelated and slightly random. My elbows are very dry today. I have put Jergens Ultra Healing Lotion on several times and they just soak it right up.

Friday, January 02, 2009

But What about the Shows I still have yet to Watch

I came home this past weekend to my DVR blinking. It really didn't phase me too much. I simply don't have much time to watch TV. It is not really on my priority list. I love to put on some music and read a book, instead.. I have great fun sticking in a DVD into the player and getting on the treadmill (okay, great fun might be an overstatement). The point is, TV is low on my list. I save it for the few and far between lazy days that I have. That is why I think DVR is the best thing since sliced bread. Someone (Carrie) will ask if I have seen the latest Big Bang. I always have to tell her no, but then usually will watch it within a day or two (fast forwarding through those pesky commercials) then call her back and laugh at what silly thing Shelton had done.

So, finally New Years Day I made some effort to figure out the problem. Hit the reset button, unplugged and plugged it back in. Called DirecTV. Was told to do the same things while their system is running some checks. Yep, the box is fried, completely out of commission. They couldn't even tell what had happened. They want me to send the box to them so they can try to figure that out to prevent it from happening to other systems. So, they are sending me a new one. This means that I will have to go through and reset all the season passes. And those shows that I had been saving for my Lazy day (which yesterday was a perfect example)? Gone. So, I will have to wait to catch Shelton in reruns. This is a sad day.
A Reminder of How Much my Dogs Mean to Me

I saw "Marley & Me" yesterday in the theaters. I had read the book, so I knew exactly what to expect. If you are planning to see or read, please, save reading this post until after you have seen the movie or read the book. I really don't want to ruin anything for you. Although it is more about me than Marley, I don't want you to say you weren't warned...

The book/movie envoked two very precious memories for me. First was after there was a loss in the couples life. She couldn't cry, not at the doctors office, not on the trip home, not even with her husband. But when she got home, Marley was there, she was able to throw her arms around him and cry. How many times have I been unable (or unwilling) to cry in front of others and then gone home to Miriam? With Miriam, she doesn't tell me to stop crying, she doesn't ask questions about what's wrong, she just knows that I am hurting and is grateful to be there with me. When I finally lift my head from her shoulder, then she is ready with a comforting lick across the face. Almost as if she is saying, see its not so bad, nothing that a slimey tongue can't fix. Miriam has calmed alot in the past couple of years. She walks slower, jumps off the bed more gently in the morning, I know her site is failing, and her hearing is beginning to slip a bit. But she is still the same soul that loves me, loves her family.

The second was a little more painful. John said to Marley, "You will let me know when its time, won't you? I don't think I can make this decision by myself." Meaning when it was time to let Marley go, to put him to sleep. The first dog I thought of was Delmar. Letting him go after he was hit by a car was the hardest thing, and I am still afraid I was not brave enough to let him go when I should have, but waited through a couple of days of pain for him. Then I thought of Blaze, the wonder dog from my childhood. I was not there or in on the decision to let him go. I was away at school. She was an amazing dog. She used to climb on top of the dog house to sit. I think about my friend Katherine, who also had to let her dog go. I think about Craig and Rhonda and them saying goodbye to Killian. Letting go of your dog is inevitable--we simply live longer than our pets. But it doesn't mean that saying goodbye is ever easy. Katherine once explained to me that it was a misnomer to call your pet your child. The dog is simply not as selfish. Rather the dog seems to think it is all about you. All the dog really wants to do is love you, protect you, and make you happy. Treat him right and you will have a truly loyal friend.
Meeting New People

There are times in life when you are about to meet someone new. You know the meeting is coming, you have been planning it for months. After all, it was a specially planned weekend trip to accomplish the meeting. For me, there are different approaches that I have to meeting new people. There is the personal side, the business side and the counselor side. And yes, they really are all different.

The Counselor side is truly my easiest. This is a role I slip into naturally. My first priority is always to put the other person at ease and to begin to establish rapport right away. If they are not comfortable, then we won't get to the heart of the matter and therapy will not take place. I love meeting new people in this setting. Usually we have set goals and issues in mind to talk about. It is purposeful conversation and searching for a topic is not a problem. The other thing that makes this extremely comfortable for me, is that self-disclosure on my part is limited. I am the one asking the questions. I am the one gathering the information and forming theories of what will work best for that client. It is all about them. If I am going to self-disclose, I will have already worked out in my head how that would be beneficial for the client.

The Business side of meeting new people is a little less comfortable, but I'm getting better and better. Give me a sales person and I can make idle chit chat with them for hours on end. The part that I am still working on is how to politely stop the conversation so that I can actually accomplish some work. Can't exactly be entering invoices and double checking that work if you have a sales person babbling on about springs and steel quality and blah, blah, blah. Of course, these are conversations that I do want to listen to, so that I know who has what in stock when it comes time to order. So I do listen, that is until they get to the let me tell you about what my kids did this past weekend... I guess I would include in this category Job Interviews, and co-worker conversations. No problems there either.

The personal meeting of new people. I am not very good at this at all. (I know in my head that I am better than I tend to feel like I am, but oh, the fits of uncomfortableness that I go through). I tend to be rather quiet and reserved on meeting new people. Once I begin to get to know someone, I open up a lot more (you know, that give and take of personal information). So, my usual M.O. when meeting new people and I have to watch this, is to slip into counselor mode, make it all about them. It puts the other person at ease fairly quickly and allows them a chance to talk about themselves. Problem--they want to know me too.

The meeting this Weekend? I met the family of a very dear friend. The stakes were high. After all, I wanted to make a good impression. Was I nervous? Ha! Of course, I was. I wasn't too worried about them liking me, most people like me without too much trouble. (I know, a little full of myself). My main worry was how to let them get to know me in such a short time when usually it can take several meetings before I am comfortable enough to start opening up. I think I did okay. After all, we were all determined to like each other, which is a very good place to start. I was able to be a little more talkative when I would have preferred to just sit back and listen. It was a good weekend. And even better it was a good meeting of new people.